Sorry - I temporarily ran out of words.

All the good intentions of posting regularly last year fell by the wayside, we had a pretty difficult year from start to finish. Some joy thrown in there - some big achievements and beautiful moments but it would be remiss of me to gloss over quite how difficult things were at times.

When I was younger I saw my adult relatives as having their lives together and life being plan sailing - realising that actually most of this was just the view from the outside looking in has bene somewhat jarring. Adult life lately feels a lot like trying to finish a major project - repeating the mantra that "things will quieten down after this week" - repeat until, well for ever it seems.

Sometimes I find it helpful to write and talk things out but as I couldn't say much about our situation it didnt feel authentic to post a muted version of what was on my mind. So I have remained somewhat quiet on here but found my voice in other spaces. And now we begin to move forward and heal, life looks different to how we imagined but we are where we need to be with the people we choose to have in our lives. Anyway, onto the dogs....

In December 2025 we lost our beautiful Bella, our olde English bulldog (Top and bottom photos) She was only two years old and had been diagnosed with an aggressive osteosarcoma which had spread to her lungs. An initial lump appeared overnight and despite repeated visits and a range of tests her quality of life dropped massively and there was little they could do for her. Devastating feels too small a word for those few weeks. That feeling of desperation, of paying for more tests and more treatments to come to nothing. Bella was a light in a really dark time for us, she came needing us and in honesty I think we needed her just as much. I don't regret the short time we had, she shone and with it she warmed our hearts at the same time. I swore to myself that I couldn't do it again, it was just too hard.

A few weeks later we came across Otis ( middle photos!) , the rest as they say is history. He is a Staffordshire Bull Terrier cross Old English Bulldog so a hybrid of our very first dog Oscar and Bella - personality wise he could not be more different! It has been some time since I have had a puppy in the house and let me tell you it has been a shock to the system. I am so grateful for him though - he brings me joy and ensures that I laugh at least hourly. He is quite possibly also the reason that I am going grey!

That's the thing with being a dog owner, they take up space in your home and heart and once they are gone that space seems too big. The house feels too still,the silence too loud. I think I am perhaps destined to always have an animal and I'm okay with that!

Our lovely Princess continues to astound us, she is now 15 years old and enjoys the company of Otis, she can still hold her own and enjoys a playful 10 minutes before a rest. Princess did not do well with losing Bella - she has always had the company of another dog and became withdrawn. He has helped engage her again and its lovely to see them together.

I'm enjoying being back out walking, its an entirely different way of life than we had with Bella as she was so fearful of people and other dogs. Otis and Princess are inquisitive but indifferent with other dogs - preferring the fuss from the humans.